hat do women look for in men? This question will never have a good answer. Each person has his own world full of circumstances that will make him look for one thing or another. Are there any general traits that make a man more attractive to a woman? There is only one way to find out: interview a lot of women and draw conclusions from this field study. That’s what bestlifeonline and the Opinion Reseach Corporation of New Jersey did when they were commissioned to develop a study that looks at what makes a man attractive. Specifically, what aspects of your personality, your physique, your character and what skills you need to be attractive.

In the study, more than 1,000 women between the ages of 21 and 54 were asked this question. And the first surprise is that physical attractiveness is not above other characteristics, but rather a kind of extra. Only 13% of the women surveyed mentioned muscles as an attractive factor. However, 66% say they like a man to have moral integrity. But what do women want? It seems that they are looking for a confident, funny and stylish man. To check if you are the perfect man and your love failures are just a random possibility, here are the 20 most sought-after qualities:

Traits of a seductive man

That he is faithful, trustworthy, kind, upright, with a moral sense and endowed with a paternal instinct.

Personality traits of an attractive man

Sense of humor, intelligent, passionate, self-confident, generous.

Practical skills of an attractive man

Who is a good listener, romantic, good in bed, good at cooking, good at cleaning, and has good financial potential.

Physical attributes of an attractive man

A sense of style, beauty, good height, muscle, physical condition.

Meeting these 20 requirements makes you the most attractive man on the planet. But don’t get obsessed, meeting them all is almost impossible. What you can do is adopt the philosophy behind many of them: self-confidence that allows you to control the energies and channel them appropriately into understanding, empathy and a sense of humor, while bringing calm to deal with the setbacks that life throws at us. It’s clear, right? Attractive men are aware of their limitations and strengths and above all they never lose their cool or are aggressive. They always seem to know what to do in any situation.

What makes a man physically attractive

The work commissioned by bestlifeonline focuses on the psychosocial aspects of men. But what about the physical? To find out, we need to review other studies that have tried to shed light on this aspect, such as the one conducted by the Royal Society Open Science. In the work, they analyzed the evaluations of 800 women in the United States between 17 and 79 years old, who evaluated the body and face of dozens of computer-generated figures that are the result of mixing the physical characteristics of 9,000 men.

And the conclusion was surprising: what makes a man more attractive is his legs. The main conclusion was that most of them found particularly attractive men who had legs that were about half the length of their height. In addition, those with legs that were too long or too short would be particularly unattractive. The authors of the book make sure that this perception is based on an evolving system of judgment because people with undersized limbs are associated with health problems such as type II diabetes.

Here’s what women REALLY hate in men

We often talk about the qualities we look for in a guy. But rarely about what the vast majority of women find repulsive!


You see the guy who starts to send you “I’ve really evolved, all you say is things I’ve experienced and from which I’ve returned”. Well, come back, we’re leaving!


A derivative of the previous one: every time you speak, he rectifies! Date, place, time, you feel like you’re going through your high school again as soon as you open it. We are not here to feel humiliated!


So yes, we could have also mentioned Mr. I decide everything. But we decided and, the worst thing is to have a kid to drag everywhere by the hand. Not to mention that he sometimes has the luxury of sulking.


“Oh, it’s your birthday?” No but hell on earth! Especially when you’ve mentioned it a dozen times in a week… And the train tickets to Normandy? Forgotten too! Rrrr, do you guys know calendars?


You’ve got a lot on your plate but fortunately, Loulou is here to listen to you tonight. Anyway. The little test of the unexpected question “What do you think?” turns out to be positive. He wasn’t listening to you! The best start to an argument we’ve ever found!


The picture to hang in the living room, it’s been hanging in your entrance for two months? Normal, you live with a guy of the type Why do today what you can do tomorrow, probable fan of Orelsan. Take heart.


We know and hate cheapskates. But there are also guys who hurt you in the worst way: by insisting on paying you the exact price of the ice cream you gave him. It smells like a psychorigid guy who doesn’t want to owe you anything… In case he needs to pay you back one day!

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It is important to know that 93% of our communication is non-verbal. It is therefore important to know exactly how to make our body language work for us in our relationships. In this article, I will give you 10 tips on how to feel better in your body and in your relationship with others. Very quickly, you will feel empowered, because your body will move and vibrate to its highest degree.


Most people will go through their day without a smile. We live by the precept: metro, work, sleep and we lose our desire to live and to blossom. The people who will smile are those who have made the decision to spread light and positive vibes. This is a real strength, because we will look at this person and ask ourselves “What is their secret? Your smile is your calling card, because you will differentiate yourself from 99% of the people who have lost it. I suggest you try it for a week and you will see for yourself that the smile will change the way you approach your day.


The idea is to be able to have enough space in front of your torso to make room for your movements and not block your breathing. It’s a bit like meditation where you have to breathe well and be aware of what’s going on in your stomach. When you have to talk to someone, you should take the time to take a deep breath and feel the oxygen flowing through your chest. This will help you to take a more “dominant” posture, as you will straighten up and take more space. On the other hand, people who do not do this and breathe poorly are the ones who will curl up and look like they are shrinking.


When you look someone in the eye, you create a “connection” between you. If you do a simple test in the metro, you will realise that the person you are talking to will look at you and wonder about your intention. Similarly, when you are talking to someone, eye contact maintains a relationship based on closeness and importance. On the other hand, a person who avoids eye contact will be seen as shy and more fragile. Eye contact can really help you in the power of your body language.


We all have our own personal space. When someone comes close to you, at some point you feel that they are getting too close and that bothers you. This space is to be managed, because it determines your personal limit which you should not cross. This same space does not or cannot exist for our lover or our family. It is important to be able to manage this space well, because people are not aware of it and will tend to get too close to you. If you manage it well, you will be able to put a stop or step back so that the person respects this social barrier.


If you are anxious and constantly touch your hands to reassure yourself, the other person will see that you are not confident. If you look around you, you will see that hands have their own language. Between people who talk by moving their hands and others who tend to hide them, it’s a good indicator of your personality. From now on, when you speak, try to see what your hand language is. You can then change your hand language to feel more confident.


Your body language speaks for you, so distracting movements must be controlled. A confident person will not spend time touching their hands and hair for example. When you walk into a room and look down, it says a lot about your confidence. If you are the type of person who takes a long time to find your position on a chair, it also says something about your inner stress. Distracting movements are those that you may not realise but are part of the non-verbal language palette.


It is always best to speak calmly and clearly to be understood. If you tend to speak too fast, you will not be understood properly. A confident person will put their words down and speak meaningful words to inspire confidence. If you speak too fast, you will not be heard by your audience. I advise you to pay attention to your pace and rate of speech in order to have more impact in your discussions.


When someone is talking to you and you cross your arms while listening: this is a form of exclusion, because you are in a closed position. If your face is closed, it’s the same, whereas a smile includes the person in the discussion. Our body speaks and will put itself in a position of exclusion without us really being aware of it. This is why we need to take a step back from our body language. The simple act of smiling and opening your arms in greeting can change the way others perceive you.


If you can change your body language, but you can’t be open emotionally, it will be counterproductive. That’s why, when you’re on a date, you need to focus on the person without looking at your messages and notifications. When you are in a relationship with someone, you need to be able to be there 100% for that person.


If you are in front of someone who is super dynamic, you need to be able to adapt to their pace. If you are in a recruitment interview, you should position yourself as a “mirror” to the person you are interviewing. This means that you will adapt to the other person’s body characteristics. By doing this, you will get in touch much more easily. We don’t realise it, but when we are in a relationship, we tend to adapt our body language to the other person.

Body language can be adapted according to the circumstances and the person we are talking to. We simply have to be careful how we position ourselves and respond to the messages in our environment. If you can follow the advice in this article, you will feel better in your body very quickly.

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In this article, I’m going to give you these 3 persuasion techniques that will help you change your relationship with the world. You will be able to get into the head of your interlocutor quickly and efficiently. The aim is not to manipulate, but to get what you want through gentleness, empathy and kindness. These are tricks used by the most talented salespeople in the world, if you practice you will get what you want.


When you walk into an Appel Store and look at what the brand offers, a salesperson will come and offer to help you. In less than ten minutes, he will manage to sell you a product! How did he do it? You told him your problems with photos, videos, applications, batteries, performance of your current phone. He went through the list one by one to prove to you that his product will solve all your problems. Indeed, the new iPhone has a better battery, it takes professional pictures… He will make you believe that it is actually your idea! You can use the same practice in your daily life, you just have to respect 3 steps:

  • Listen to the person you are talking to
  • Identify the problems, priorities and projects.
  • Propose a solution that will answer their questions. They will eventually tell you that you are offering them exactly what they have always wanted.


Your friend is unhappy in her relationship, but cannot find a way to leave her man. You will ask her about her problems, her shortcomings and her frustrations. By taking up her ideas one by one, you will show her that in fact she already has the answers to her questions and that she wants to leave to start her life again.


When we want something, we will take actions that are directly linked to our value system.

desire -> value -> action

Example: If one of my values is affection, I will want to be close to certain people and I will therefore act by being more sociable with others. As a result, my value will be satisfied.

You will have observed this action and detected that the person’s value is affection. When you talk to him, you will emphasise love, friendship and the importance of closeness. You will talk to them about the importance of affection in relationships with others. The person will feel completely confident, because you will be able to talk to him/her by touching his/her heart.

By looking for the value that is related to the desire, you will get closer to the person you are talking to. We feel close to people who share our values. To achieve this, you have to put yourself in the shoes of the person you are talking to in order to understand how they operate.


If your friend is emotional, you will speak in the same way to get her to agree with your ideas.

Example: If you want to change your home decoration but you know your husband is careful about spending money. Show him that IKEA is cheaper than another shop. Show him that you have made an excel table comparing prices. He’ll be reassured and you’ll be able to treat yourself by changing your decor.

When you want to get someone to agree to your ideas, you should list the positive points that could change their mind.

If you want to go on holiday with a friend who likes culture, you will make a small folder to show her all the places you can discover.

Now you know how to get anyone to agree to your ideas. Needless to say, these are techniques that should be applied with love and empathy, not malice.

6 Basic Tips To Get What You Want

I wish I could tell you that there is only a little three-line form to fill out to get absolutely everything we want in life, but no. Unfortunately, it takes a little more than a little paperwork to achieve all of our personal or professional goals.

Whether it’s a deadline, a push, or a leave of absence, asking for something from your boss can be one of the hardest tasks on our to-do list. Today I’m sharing some tips on how to get the big and small requests right.

1. Be clear

Being as specific as possible is essential when making a request at work (and in real life, too). There’s no need to beat around the bush. Eliminate miscommunication, misunderstanding or confusion. Instead of saying something like, “I don’t have enough time to work on this project…,” make sure you ask a clear question. Instead, say, “Would it be possible to extend my deadline until noon tomorrow?” After all, knowing how to ask the right questions is crucial to your success, happiness and satisfaction!

2. Be confident in yourself

So cliché, but so true. Yes, with the right amount of confidence, you can make the ordinary extraordinary and get what you want. If you don’t really believe you deserve that promotion, no one will. Remember all your accomplishments and good works. There’s nothing like knowing what you’re worth to get what you want!

3. Use your non-verbal communication

Did you know that your body is your best tool? Not only does your body language affect how others perceive you, but it can actually change how you see yourself and how you feel about yourself. Crossing your arms, looking at the floor and hunched over your shoulders will not only make you look less assertive and articulate, but will make you feel less confident and comfortable. Look your boss straight in the eye and use your body language to your advantage.

4. Putting your thoughts on paper

Whether you’re asking for a pay raise or just asking a simple question, I think preparation is key. If you’re having trouble expressing what you want to say, why not write down your thoughts to help you organize them? After all, you can never be too prepared.

5. Smile, say thank you and please

Be courteous without overdoing it. This is the most important tip, in my opinion. Most of the time, it’s not necessarily what you say, but how you say it. For example, if you are asking for a raise that you feel is well deserved, be sure to express your appreciation for the job you have. In the worst case scenario, you’ll have tried without losing anything.

6. Never let a negative answer affect you

A “no” doesn’t mean you should give up or that you don’t deserve what you asked for. Instead, think of the “no” as a motivation to continue or to challenge yourself. Hooray for positivism!

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Many times we feel that we have been tricked in fairly simple circumstances, yet we are unable to understand what happened. In his book “Influence and Manipulation”, Robert Cialdini presents the main mechanisms of persuasion. Thanks to him, you will now be able to identify them, protect yourself against them and eventually play them.


This principle is embedded in us as a basic principle. It creates an ‘obligation’, a debt to the person who has done us a favour or offered us something, whether we asked for it or not.

  • Price mechanics: we tend to associate high price with quality. Thus, sometimes, putting a low price will not motivate sales since we will think that the product is of poor quality, whereas giving a high price to the same product will increase sales by giving an impression of quality
  • Giving a reason: asking for a service by giving a reason, whatever it may be, promotes acceptance
  • Principle of human perception: “warmth feels warmer after being in the cold”. This principle is based on this idea and is used in particular to increase acceptance of ideas. By starting with an idea that will obviously be rejected, one can more easily fall back on one’s basic idea which, by comparison, will seem more reasonable, thus increasing its chances of being accepted.


This principle is embedded in us as a basic principle. It creates an ‘obligation’, a debt to the person who has done us a favour or offered us something, whether we asked for it or not.

  • Strength of the rule: the rule of reciprocity sometimes overcomes the influence of other factors that normally determine our consent
  • Forced debts: gratitude is an unpleasant feeling – but an individual who violates the rule by accepting a gift without trying to reciprocate is frowned upon
  • Unfair exchanges: in return for a small gesture, this principle encourages us to accept much greater demands in return
  • Reciprocal concessions: this consists of asking for a first thing in the knowledge that it will be refused, only to fall back on what is really desired in the knowledge that the other person will not dare say no to the pseudo-concession that has just been made. We therefore find ourselves accepting what seems to us to be ‘the lesser evil’ when we would have said no if it had been proposed to us first.

How to say no?
We need to be discerning in order to differentiate between pure generosity and gestures intended to manipulate us.


“It is easier to resist first than later” Leonardo da Vinci

Once we have made a decision, we are subjected to internal and external pressures and do everything to justify it. We lie to ourselves to keep our opinions and feelings in line with what we have already chosen to do. Sometimes we place consistency above sound judgement.

  • Strength of character: coherence is associated with intelligence and strength of character. However, sometimes it is a form of mental laziness, or even a fear of what we might discover if we ask the right questions.
  • Public commitment = lasting commitment: any commitment creates a principle in us that we must stand by what we have said, even if we have said it in particular circumstances.

How do you say no?
You have to listen to your instincts and know how to question yourself by really asking yourself why you choose to act in a certain way.


“When everyone thinks alike, no one really thinks” Walter Lippman

We are influenced by the behaviour of the people around us. Not only those close to us, but also and especially strangers, unconsciously. When we are not in control of a situation, we tend to unconsciously look for the answer in the behaviour of others and copy it.

How do we say no?
We have to make sure that we remain vigilant through our own discernment.


“A lawyer’s job is essentially to make his client sympathetic to the jury” Clarence Darrow

It is difficult to refuse a service or request from a friend or neighbour. Sales professionals are not necessarily our friends, so they will try to make us like them.

Several criteria come into play in order for us to find a person sympathetic

  • Physical appearance: we associate qualities such as intelligence, talent, kindness and honesty with people who look good
  • Similarity: since most people are neither really beautiful nor really ugly, we value what we look like
  • Compliments: the idea that someone likes us is nice and obviously makes them more likeable in our eyes. This is why people who want something often use flattery.
  • Contact and cooperation: these elements develop our likeability by creating habit and making us work together
  • Conditioning and association: gaining sympathy can also be done by associating with what the target person likes

How can we say no?
If we are too quickly taken with someone who is trying to persuade us, they are probably using this manipulative technique.


We find it very difficult to stand up to authority and tend to defer to it. This mechanism is used particularly in the field of sales. For example, a company that wants to sell toothpaste would be well advised to use the support of dentists, who are authorities in their field. Their endorsement makes us more likely to buy. This also applies to elements with authority connotations:

  • Titles: these are the most difficult symbols of authority to acquire
  • Clothes: people wearing costumes of authority
  • Accessories: they can give us an image of authority

How to resist it?
Systematically ask yourself whether the authority in question is really competent and objective.


Professional persuaders know that we value what is rare. Therefore, opportunities are more interesting to us if they are exceptional. Convincing people that something is rare increases its value.

  • Psychological reactance: the less accessible something is, the more we desire it
  • Optimal conditions: we desire more when we move from a situation of abundance to one of scarcity

How to say no?
When the situation demands an immediate reaction, it is very difficult for us to act with discernment since we are caught up in an emotional reaction. To say no, we need to really ask ourselves what we want through the object of our desire. We have to make sure that we don’t want it just “to have it”.

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